Denzel Washington is a racist comedian! (#5)

If you were to start writing a novel, what would be the basis for your work? Vonnegut obviously chose his war experiences but seems to have tied them into a somewhat laissez faire view of life. What do you feel the public should learn through your story-telling? Explain the genre, character types and / or general plot of a book that you would write.

Believe it or not, I've written many short stories throughout my life both in school and out of school. I once even considered pursuing a career in literature and creative writing. But, like most people over time, I changed and set my eyes on another potential career. However, I've always wanted to write my own fiction novel based on real events, much like Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse Five, but I could never find the time to do it. If I DID write my own novel though, it wouldn't be a typical teenage romance story (sorry ladies ;) or an action-packed/mystery/things-blowing-up novel either (sorry fellas ;).

Whoever's hiding in the bottom left corner is a goner. When
Denzel gives you that look, you're not getting anything less
than a steak with cut up springs in it. 

I'm a HUGE movie lover, and one of my favourite types of movies are post-apocalyptic or dystopian movies. The Book of Eli is one that comes to mind (starring Denzel Washington). The main character is clearly shown to have a mission throughout the movie, but the directors also manage to show the different aspects of society during this time. From rich, educated book collectors to prostitutes and store owners, the characters in these morphed worlds are relatable to us, but they also allow the director to add his or her own creativity to help us envision a different form of society. There is so much potential in writing a post-apocalyptic novel to add my own beliefs and ideas while taking the reader to a whole new world to explore. Movies give the viewer a sneak peak of what could be an amazing book, which may be the reason Brave New World and 1984 didn't do as well on the big screen as they did as literary masterpieces. 

Now, maybe this is becuase I've just read Slaughterhouse for the first time, but I feel that I can relate my own creative writing style to Vonnegut's. We both enjoy employing dark humour into our work, although his is probably far more evil than mine. My humour would be similar in that I'd make subliminal jokes and let comedic comments slip by in serious or tense moments. There would be plenty of these tense moments in my novel, since a typical post-apocalyptic movie would revolve around some sort of destroyed world and/or an evil tyrannical force (I, Robot, I'm talking to you!). I'm a pretty easy going guy, and I feel that a person's writing (much like their music, art, and what they eat) shows who they are as a person and is a reflection of their personality. That's why I feel that my writing should include a hint of comedy even in the most random of situations. 


I personally do not consider myself racist or support racism in anyway, but I think that making stereotypical comments about a wide range of races is an easy way to grab attention, attract controversy, and get people to laugh. Much like this guy, my novel would include stereotypical characters that, if they were to be described on this blog, may get me suspended or force Mr. Lynn to fail me. The main character would be a flawed one, making him more relatable to the average reader. Greed, anger, and corruption would be widespread in a post-apocalyptic world, so any human would be susceptible to negative behaviour. I haven't really done many interesting things with my life yet (sigh, not my fault), but I think that I have read about and met a decent amount of different people that could be used for inspiration for characters. It's always helpful to have a foundation for characters that a writer could add to and change. However, many people would not be able to relate to many characters. This will become clear once you read the plot outline. I really hope most of you guys reading this aren't greedy murderous gang members (no offense, if you are :$). 


Ah, the plot. Of course, this is one of the most important parts of the novel, after the characters and the paper to print the story on. I don't want to ruin the whole book for you, since you'll have to pay for the whole thing when I become rich and famous, but it goes a little like this.


A man (we'll call him Tim for now) is living in a post-apocalyptic world being ruled by gangs and thieves. It is 2099, and every man fends for himself. Most of the female population has been wiped out, with the few women either disguised as men, working as prostitutes, or infertile because of complex mutations traced back to terrible living conditions and disease infestation. The human population has been decreasing significantly, with almost no children born after 2070 and most of them killed by the time they hit puberty. Tim, born in 2076 to a women who was forced to abandon him at birth, is a nomad in this world and constantly moving from one location to another. He was cared for as a child by a man (let us call him Marshal) who felt pity on him, and they would become like father and son as they aged. Marshal dies early in the novel,  but his teachings live on through Tim: kill, or be killed. This Darwinian ideology follows Tim throughout the novel as we see how the world has changed by the end of the 21st century. There are plenty of twists and turns, however, when Tim realizes that survival may mean the interference of an outsider he may have to trust. This will change his life in a way that could yield to be an abnormal power... or a curse.


On shelves November 6, 2011.