Neo runs over gorillas in Pokemon snowball fight! (#4)

Choose three moments in your life (you can embellish or create fictional events if you want) and imitate the style and structure of Vonnegut’s narrative. Warp through your life and make connections between significant moments. Write a minimum of three paragraphs that follow the same unconventional story-telling style. Consider using figurate language and repetitive phrases (e.g. So it goes) in your writing.


Listen,


Tareq didn't see it coming. Who was he to know that the child on the other side of the road would teleport onto the hood of his car? Or at least that's what he thought happened. His feelings were melted together into a strange mush of shock and confusion. While bystanders ran onto the scene, rushing to help the poor child, Tareq couldn't think of anything to do but call home and tell his fiance he'd be a late from work that night. He didn't realize he'd spend the night in a cell, or that his fiance would be raped and murdered only a few hours after putting down the phone. So it goes.


It seemed like he was Neo in the world of the Matrix, moving at a pace he felt was 800 times slower than those around him. It allowed him to notice the beauty of the whole situation. Strangers were all running around to help a boy they never even seen before, let alone save his life. In about a tenth of a second, however, Tareq felt his shoulders forcefully grabbed by a man who looked to him like a gorilla with slightly less hair. He would learn later that this gorilla was the boy's father, but at the moment he was too busy being shaken from head to toe to ask any questions.


When the gorilla let him go, Tareq found himself in the shaking arms of his childhood basketball coach. He had just missed the buzzer-beating lay-up to win the game, thus eliminating them from playoff contention. It wasn't completely his fault, though. Even though the opposite team left him open, he truly believed that somebody would eventually stop him. This mental barrier seemingly forced him to zig-zag towards the net, where he performed a strange variation of a tap dance and chucked the ball into the stands. Later, he would blame this occurrence on a secret society of telepathic leprechauns, but for now he settled on the insults being hurled at him like tomatoes during a bad performance in an underground karaoke club.


After a long, hot shower, Tareq decided it was best to just go to sleep and forget about the game for the night. While putting on his Pokemon pajama pants, he didn't notice his PS3 controller laying a few inches from  his feet. Right as Pikachu slipped over his knees, Tareq's body shifted its weight and he found himself face-first in a pile of snow. The snowball thrown at him belonged to me. I was the one who threw it at him. As Tareq got up he felt more snow rush past his left ear, but he was hit with another ball while ecstatically celebrating the missed one. All things considered, this was one of the happiest moments of his pitiful life, other than high school graduation and his engagement, but those where still to come. It really was unfortunate that this would be one of the last times he'd see these people, who he considered "friends." His mother would die from cancer in only a few weeks, and his father would force the family's relocation due to the lack of jobs in their hometown of Detroit. So it goes.